They Took Us Away

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Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Why It's Illegal for Me to Find My Birth Mother, and How I Found Her

By Trace

The idea to open your adoption is full of technicality and cost. You have to know where you were born, which state, their laws and most importantly what you can do legally to find your first family. Many states are now changing their laws, making them partly open records, allowing the mother to say yes or no to contact. It's not easy out there. In my memoir One Small Sacrifice, I described how I did it. How it took years, how my mother refused to meet me but she finally gave me information to find my father Earl Bland....I wish it were easier to do this whole process but in the end, I did meet my dad and we had reunion. I wish that for every adoptee out there...



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Veronica, we adult adoptees are thinking of you today and every day. We will be here when you need us. Your journey in the adopted life has begun, nothing can revoke that now, the damage cannot be undone. Be courageous, you have what no adoptee before you has had; a strong group of adult adoptees who know your story, who are behind you and will always be so.

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As the single largest unregulated industry in the United States, adoption is viewed as a benevolent action that results in the formation of “forever families.”
The truth is that it is a very lucrative business with a known sales pitch. With profits last estimated at over $1.44 billion dollars a year, mothers who consider adoption for their babies need to be very aware that all of this promotion clouds the facts and only though independent research can they get an accurate account of what life might be like for both them and their child after signing the adoption paperwork.


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