They Took Us Away

They Took Us Away
click image to see more and read more

it's free

click

How to Use this Blog

BOOZHOO! We've amassed tons of information and important history on this blog since 2010. If you have a keyword, use the search box below. Also check out the reference section above. If you have a question or need help searching, use the contact form at the bottom of the blog.



We want you to use BOOKSHOP to buy books! (the editor will earn a small amount of money or commission. (we thank you) (that is our disclaimer statement)

This is a blog. It is not a peer-reviewed journal, not a sponsored publication... WE DO NOT HAVE ADS or earn MONEY from this website. The ideas, news and thoughts posted are sourced… or written by the editor or contributors.

EMAIL ME: tracelara@pm.me (outlook email is gone) WOW!!! THREE MILLION VISITORS!

SEARCH

Saturday, October 26, 2013

ADOPTION INDUSTRY TRAFFICKERS: The Light is on YOU


 By Trace A. DeMeyer, author of One Small Sacrifice

I was so naive when I took foster care training in the mid-1990s. I really was. I was in my mid 30s, an adoptee from a stranger adoption in Wisconsin, about to be divorced and there I was thinking about doing the Oregon foster-to-adopt program. I was thinking I could give a child a better life but eventually I changed my mind. I couldn't help but think any child I took in would wish to be with their "real" parents. That was my mindset, how I felt growing up. That thought really hasn't changed.

Then I decided to really look at my life, what I had done with it. I realized I was in no condition to adopt anyone. I couldn't love anyone. Yep, that was definitely true. And I hated my life. I hated what happened to me, being adopted. Time after time, I forgave. I forgave the pedophile who adopted me, who I called dad.  I forgave the woman who I called mom who lived in a fantasy world the entire time I knew her. I forgave my soon to be ex-husband and many others. (Eventually I forgave my birthmother and I found and met my birthfather and relatives in 1994.)

I wore the marks of disappointment all over my soul. Why? I could never be their biological daughter so I "created" who I thought the DeMeyer family wanted. I took up so much time trying to be that perfect daughter. I tried hard to please my adoptive parents. I literally wasted years - I mean more than half my life  - trying.

Then I tried to be what everyone else wanted. I didn't realize that I could have my own life. How is this possible I didn't know I could choose for myself? It was like "I" didn't exist. I was just a mosaic of other people's expectations. I was not a happy camper so I made some good choices for me - like getting counseling and knowing myself - finally.

My reading at the Pequot Museum
So fast forward to 2004, when I left my job as editor of the Pequot Times newspaper. I decided to look at adoption again. Not to adopt but to look at it as a journalist. I decided to pursue the study of adoption on my own, not to gain a college degree. I read everything. I read studies, I read blogs, I read books, I read history. I read more pages of text than I could write in my lifetime.

I decided I wanted to know who is really running this billion dollar adoption industry. I decided to look at global poverty and how it creates slave conditions which can lead to human trafficking. I looked at how young people fall into lust and create children when they are children themselves. I looked at how world religions treat unwed mothers. I looked at countries that do not allow adoption by Americans. I looked at how adult adoptees are rarely mentioned in what I call adoption propaganda. I looked at how psychology was just noticing that adoptees were suffering and not living a "fairy tale" life.  I studied birth psychology. I looked at adoption agency ads. I looked at couples who ran ads for a baby to adopt. I looked at the marketing by the adoption industry who created a niche for themselves, using newborns and young children (with living parents) to be the human guinea pigs for their experiment. I looked at intercountry adoption and how it makes some people very rich. I looked at industry profits. I looked at the history of the Indian Adoption Projects and ARENA. I looked at the governments who created and funded these adoption programs. I looked at how religions advanced the false idea there are orphans everywhere and someone needs to save them. I looked at how the adoption industry convinces people that babies are blank slates and we will adapt and be perfectly happy as the adoptee. I looked at how many children in foster care could have been placed with their own relatives instead of strangers! I looked at the suicide rates of adoptees, many who didn't make it to middle age.

Then I met adoptees. I met outspoken brilliant adoptees who filled me and educated me with a new narrative and perspective.

I thought I was emotionally well when I started my memoir in 2004 and as each year passed I woke up more and more to the truth that I wasn't healed.  I didn't set out to do this work but somehow this work chose me. And as I learned more, I healed more.

So I googled "The Adoption Industry" and found this website. I want you to look at it. I want you to study it as I have. I want you to open your eyes. I want the adoption industry, child traffickers and the adoption agencies to worry that their days are numbered. I want them to feel exposed. I want them to know there is a growing awareness and that the world is watching them. I want them to know that many of us see adoption as trafficking in babies to satisfy infertile couples needs and we know some couples feel important and special for bringing up a child that is not their own offspring. I want those people who adopt to realize we adoptees would never choose to be adopted. We'd rather be raised by family members, whenever it's possible.
Adoptees are Mending the Hoop

I want you readers to know that hundreds of adoptees I have met or talked to are healing too. We are mending the hoop. Some have made the journey back to their first families and tribes and are healing with their entire communities.

Adoptees across the planet are working to unseal our adoption records and change archaic laws so we can all make our journeys home.

Most of all, I want the adoption industry (traffickers) to know who they are dealing with... the light is on...WE are watching and writing and blogging and you can't hide your secrets and greed anymore.

1 comment:

  1. This is a great post!

    I just wish I could share your optimism. Unfortunately, I am feeling more pessimistic and negative after the recent high-profile legalized kidnappings that happened right out in the open and right under our noses.

    I think the entitlement of PAPs has gotten even stronger and that our society is moving even further away from the belief that natural parents have an inviolable right to their own offspring. With all the new family configurations these days, the sanctity of the bio-parent/child relationship is being eroded, and its erosion more accepted, than ever before.

    ReplyDelete

Please: Share your reaction, your thoughts, and your opinions. Be passionate, be unapologetic. Offensive remarks will not be published. We are getting more and more spam. Comments will be monitored.
Use the comment form at the bottom of this website which is private and sent direct to Trace.


Happy Visitors!

Blog Archive

Featured Post

Theft of Tribal Lands

This ascendancy and its accompanying tragedy were exposed in a report written in 1924 by Lakota activist Zitkala-Sa, a.k.a. Gertrude Simmon...


Wilfred Buck Tells The Story Of Mista Muskwa

WRITTEN BY HUMANS!

WRITTEN BY HUMANS!

Most READ Posts

Bookshop

You are not alone

You are not alone

To Veronica Brown

Veronica, we adult adoptees are thinking of you today and every day. We will be here when you need us. Your journey in the adopted life has begun, nothing can revoke that now, the damage cannot be undone. Be courageous, you have what no adoptee before you has had; a strong group of adult adoptees who know your story, who are behind you and will always be so.

Diane Tells His Name


click photo

60s Scoop Survivors Legal Support

GO HERE: https://www.gluckstein.com/sixties-scoop-survivors

Lost Birds on Al Jazeera Fault Lines

Lost Birds on Al Jazeera Fault Lines
click to read and listen about Trace, Diane, Julie and Suzie

ADOPTION TRUTH

As the single largest unregulated industry in the United States, adoption is viewed as a benevolent action that results in the formation of “forever families.”
The truth is that it is a very lucrative business with a known sales pitch. With profits last estimated at over $1.44 billion dollars a year, mothers who consider adoption for their babies need to be very aware that all of this promotion clouds the facts and only though independent research can they get an accurate account of what life might be like for both them and their child after signing the adoption paperwork.


click THE COUNT 2024 for the ADOPTEE SURVEY

NEW MEMOIR

Original Birth Certificate Map in the USA

Google Followers


back up blog (click)